Ok, I never thought I'd blog. Truth be told, I'd been thinking about it for some time, but I never actually thought I'd do it. It just seemed like too much effort. Part of me - the writer/yet-to-be-published novelist part - figured it was time to start building what is often referred to in the publishing industry as a "platform", which I guess is another way of saying creating a virtual presence in the wide world of the web out there, instead of just being a reflection on the computer screen. Part of me - the protective lioness guarding her cubs part - felt blogging required a level of candor I wasn't quite ready to commit to, considering my current circumstances (I'll explain soon). Yet another part - the-grew-up-in-Asia-amid-quasi-feudal-splendor-can't-I-just-pay-someone-to-do-it-for-me part - was just plain lazy.
So guess which part finally won?
Actually, I've got my friend Amanda to blame - she got me into Facebook, and now she's got me blogging. I think if she ever gets me to run 5ks a day... I truly would have crossed over to the dark side! Although there was a time - in another life in a tropical island far, far away - when I actually ran 5k races. If you've got boobs, even a supersnug Champion jogbra doesn't erase the fear that your mammaries will shrivel and droop with that manic running. I've gone for gentler workouts since, like Bikram yoga, Pilates and Gyrotonics. And hiphop every now and then so I can delude myself into believing I get some cardio into my fitness routine. I still don't have Madonna's body.
In another life, I was an expat wife. Today, I am an expat ho- as in hostage. Yes, in another of the supreme ironies that characterize my life, I happen to live in Hijack City. Just go to Google and find out which country has one of the highest violent crime rates in the world - where thugs hijack cars and shoot you for sport and clueless men - the Type AK-47 ones - think raping 9-month old babies is cool because it cures AIDS. Yup, that country. Or should I say, Ja, that country.
Sorry if I seem coy or evasive... but when your ex spends his waking hours obsessively trawling the web for anything he can dig up on you - oh, and I'm sure he's surfing for porn, too - you tend to be a bit more restrained in your cyber-outpourings. Hence the vague identity. Hope you understand.
Anyway, back to Hijack City. So far so good. Apart from a horrific car accident earlier this year and the front license plate of my car being stolen, I haven't been hijacked. Metaphorically, however, my life has been hijacked by an angry and vengeful ex who after more than three years of litigation refuses to finalize our divorce (and the accompanying custody case). My life has also been hijacked by the crappy judicial system in Crime Central, capital, Hijack City. Where 8 months after being told by the court I would be given a PREFERENTIAL trial date, I am still waiting to be granted one. Where divorce and custody proceedings have thus far been going on for HALF of my younger daughter's life, and a THIRD of my older daughter's life. Now isn't that obscene?
And all I want is for this nightmare to end so I can GO HOME with my daughters, be with my family, to resume my career, all in the country where Kafka wears a smile. And no, it's not the Czech Republic.
Oh, and did I mention that for the last 2 1/2 years there's been a court order in place, sought by the ex, which prevents me from leaving Crime Central with my children pending the divorce? The longer the divorce drags on, the longer the court order is in place, get it? So why do you think he hasn't bothered to insist on a new trial date?
In other words, call me Betty Mahmoudy.
Comments
You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.